The counts

I count over my fingers, all that many moments
I've been distanced from being within your care
All of those that had thoroughly consumed me
All of those that impaired my mental faculties,
Vitiated my psyche and obliviated my cognition
I feel to this very instant the living death I've had
The very feeling that time had held my breath,
And strangled me till my life was nigh oozed out,
And last dribble of my blood seemed to wither away
Oh! Am I alive? Or am I at the gates of infernal hell?
I can no more feel the pain for my senses have
Exterminated by their-selves- for the thirst that'd never
Been quenched, the smell that was never smelt
For the warmth that never soothed my turbulent heart
And for the form that existed within me has ne'er been
Formed by my eyes again- by the beams of my hope.
Dead or alive, whatever be me. If alive I shall one day
Feel your beat. If dead you certainly shall feel my soul.
Awake I'd be till that moment. And I shall count'em all.

Damsel at window ...

While you peep into the world out of your cocoon
The sun shines with an aura and blush those stars
Which hide into the veil of the cloudy shades
A subtle smile from your moon like countenance
Can trample even the most callous hearts
And hath it's presence into deepest of dreams
With the slenderness of a french damsel
And tenderness of a fresh spawned rose
While you hold my unrelenting gaze towards you
And cherish in my memories which have born just
Shalth not any man give away his world for you?
For the priceless moments that forever brings those
Blissful images that are to forever stay into mind? Nay.

Forgetful...

While running the repertoire of our lives' routine
Our mind tends to become forgetful
Of the subtleties that had once been immensities
That had occupied even the subtlest of our being itself
But as time does the defiling of its nature,
Those moments tend to loose their sheen
And obliviated be those who'd its very substance been.

In the moment I realized that it was you and
Your memories, whose form failed to contain in me
I erupted into what would else-wise be perceived
To be in a state of utter chaos. I but pledge
That my reverence to you and my fidelity
Towards you - be sustained until my last breath
And until the least of my living symbionts.

With this promise I shall now emancipate myself
From the restraints that have been binding me here
To this mean world. And shall undergo the catharsis
Of the worldly emotions and materials except
For your enigma, and for the veritable beauty that you are
Which alone, I believe can sublime my existence to eternity.

Starry Night ...

Oh! Such a beautiful starry night
I'm amazed to gaze into it's deeps
Adorned the way you bejewel self
With the pearls that twinkle over you
To the days you filled the light
And the colours of my life that ye were
It pulled me back, to moments I'd been in
This deja vu I'm now feelin'
Far not love. It feels only yesterday.
The days we made together
But it feels for-ever and far as ever
Hopeful tomorrow each moment I look for.

All a sudden it's become clouded
It felt just like that day we parted
Into their gloomy shadows faded
Each of those beauties I'm now deprived
When until shall I wait for thee?
For the rain of love you to pour over me
Withering I am in all the blood
And case the same with my breath
Save me heart and fill me with life
And with your care to vigorate mine
I beg, I beg till your heart shalt melt
And till my soul's pain, to you it reacheth.

A past...

When I tend to read through my memory
I recognize you were there a past full
This moment may not be so far, but what
I felt, it had happened a life away
May be that it was only a dream, Or
May be when I was passive to the world
I now realize it was really real and true it was
But that only I lie helpless here
It welters my heart as though my breath
Swooned until lies in me- else but no life
And like I had a terrible pouring of ever
Distressing times which fail to leave me
What at all shall I do for me?
Shall I erase all the past I fancied each day? Or
Shall I move into a tranced inane self?
I seek no answers from thee. Not a silence either.
Yeah, how would you know for you'd never
Looked into me. Alas! You'd ever wanted not.
I'm turning this page down and never I shall moan
For that was just a memory which I'd just un-sown.

Libertine...

Libertine, as though I'm, in thoughts and actions
Yet strangled into the mores of this world, by time
The scruple - only one of such- that turns up in me
Is for your sake, for your preeminence in my mind
That I take forth along with my humble senses
And that I fantasize to be in the Elysium of earth
As I lie in you, looking into your calmly eyes
While dreaming of my future that I'd vested with you
You but tantalize me and deprive me
Of thimbleful pleasure, your love, that I seek
For that be the lone sake I here remain
I can blissfully pass - let be it- to the infernal world
Or paradise. I possess no qualms or angst for this.
I hope that the Libertine in me would unfurl
As my soul would flow far. And fly farther
From you, and your bonds. It's not far from now.

F.R.I.E.N.D.S.H.I.P.....

Our days pass as though we haven't known each other
As you veered into a world of oblivion, while I still wake for day
In hope of hearing your word, while strangely it wanders in me
Through all those memories that reap me down to nothingness
Relentlessly they remind me of our times that truly were ours

While all the world I knew was just you and me and the sand castles
That I built while you broke right into'em. Yet smiling your way
With an innocent blush which compelled me to hold no grudge for you
Yes I remember them, those empty days when you deserted me
What did I know of anything? I missed none but your shoulders

And the days of our play. While we ran past air and you crouch
So as to lead me into your pranks and raise to slap me over
I could never manage your peppy moves but again they waver me
Away and then so far you went. Mind I wept for thee unspoken
Times, each I had none to express. What say I ? And who else to?

Lo all these years so away we were. Holds us still, the tender affection
We built while we played and fought under the same sun and rain
Sharing the deep emotions and pains through a flimsy veil of friendship
That bonds us and closes-in, in its love and holy spirit, protecting forever
In possession I'm- a gem, the closest of my friends that you are.